Thursday, June 27, 2013

More than two sides to every story

There are generally two opposing sides to everything, with a lot of gray area separating the two ideologies.  Our society seems to have an affinity for diametrically opposed ideas, which ultimately leads to division.  This division often leads to derision, arguments, anger, and nonacceptance.  Is this intolerance a lingering side-effect of the oppression that has clouded our history, making it difficult for us to accept change? Or is it more because we are often unable to identify with others who are different from us, or resentful that they embrace their differences; thus, making it easier for us to condemn or banish them from our social realm?  

We tend to define others as we have been raised or taught to see them.  Our perceptions drive our beliefs, just as others derive their truth from their perceptions. The definitions of what is acceptable and good has been set by those before us, and entered into our histories so that they can be passed down to us to uphold as true and right.  We, as a society, often take up these definitions in order to be accepted and on the “right side,” because redefinition requires revolution, upheaval of the norm, and it insists that we challenge the foundation upon which these perceptions and expectations have been set.  It is much easier to go along with the majority than try to defy, and ultimately change, such a large societal construct.  

We live in a time that is hypercritical of anything unusual or different.  Fear often seems to underlie these criticisms and rejections, and perhaps now is the time to analyze the root of these fears because they lie in the social and cultural constructs we have developed.  By refusing to: meet in the middle, compromise, or walk in someone else's shoes you limit your  ability to fully experience life and you miss opportunities to learn and grow.  In order to progress we must learn to be more open and accepting, and remove the ridicule and scorn from our perceptions of sociocultural constructs.  Rather than meeting difference with fear, we should try to be more curious and want to learn about our differences, so that we can embrace our diversity rather than stifle it. By opening ourselves up to concepts that we fear, we find the many shades of gray that exist. These shades fill the void between the opposite ends of the spectrum and allow these ideologies to intertwine and become less conflicted. 

By taking steps to categorize and classify, we tend to forget and/or mitigate the importance of anything outside of the labeled or accepted categorizations.  Additionally, we often assign rightness and wrongness to most of the characteristics we classify.  I realize that we have to do this in some form so that we can learn from our mistakes and to recognize danger, etc., but if there is a way to restructure this process so that we don’t associate an immediate good or bad quality to someone or something, then perhaps there could be less injustice, prejudice, discrimination, or hate. 

I think often times we exaggerate the differences to feel more unique within the overall societal context.  We want to feel important or special, so we try to differentiate ourselves from groups by defining our character in opposition to other people.  In the end we are all human, which means to me that we should all try to work together, and quit trying to tear each other down, so we can make a positive impact and contribution to the world.  (Perhaps my last sentence is overly idealistic, but I would prefer to see things optimistically, rather than create conflict and dissonance.) 

As with anything, I think it is important to maintain a balance.  As a society, I think we too often we reach out to find the Truth about anything and everything, and expect it to be black and white.  I don't think that there are very many certainties in life, rather I think there are several things that are held in a balance and easily tipped.  If there are two sides to everything then it makes it easy to be a follower of one side or the other, or even an extremist, so the fringes are littered with individuals who are unwavering; however,  it seems to be more useful to actually be the balancing point, to ensure that each side can even out and find compromise and solutions, rather than ongoing conflicts.  As humans, I don't know why we have such difficulty accepting balance, and why we try to flock to the edges. 

People often can surprise us if given the opportunity, as we have seen examples of this time and time again in popular culture, but we must give them the opportunity to be heard.  We must be more careful with our words and actions, because we wouldn't speak to someone we just met on an individual level in the same way we write.  When posting a blog, a Facebook status, or anything on the internet, it is easy to write sweeping generalities that can be hurtful, insensitive, and overstated.

I leave you with one of my favorite quotes by Jiddu Krishnamurti: “It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society.”  I believe that people are often so eager to fit into society that they unquestionably accept their norms, which leaves them adrift in a sea of conformity.  For those who stand up for themselves, or who refuse to hide behind the masks of normalcy, it becomes increasingly difficult to find a voice that can resonate over the masses. 

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